Also...

So, I did read back, and I was dumpin' on my store manager. I will admit I was harsh in what I said about her. Sometimes there's no communication (not that it's my job to make sure she's doing her job) to the rest of us about what's going on. It is necessary for the Store Manager to let the team know where she's at because if someone higher (say like a district manager) needs to contact her immediately, then someone knows how to reach her. I did actually have a meeting with her today and was able to get out some fustrations with the store out on the table. She also explained (without me asking about it) what has been going on lately with meetings and such. One thing that I've been dealing with, is that when I left the company for a period of time and came back 3 months later, I didn't have the position I had when I first left. I was in a supervisory position and so knowing things was more important for me than a basic level team member. When I was re-hired, I wasn't hired into the position I left, so I'm no longer currently a supervisor. For the longest time, I've has these fustrations because I was expecting things to be the same as before. So, having that talk with the manager really helped out, because I'm worrying about things I shouldn't. Sooo.. all this to say, is that yea, I messed up. I don't take back the venting that I did, but I do know that alot of what I was venting about, was not something that should have upset me to begin with. So, to whoever reads this. I apologize.

Kinko's Flippin' RULES!

Ok, maybe the main title is over-exaggerated. Maybe even more-so. But in my defense, I would like to make a clause to my previous post. I want to have a place that I can be uncensored, and post what I feel, when I feel it. What I say may (and probably not at all in some cases) not be right. But when I posted that blog, I was livid. I've calmed down much since then, but that doesn't mean that I regret posting it. Even if someone I work with does stumble upon this blog of mine, this would tell them how I really feel, unlike at work where I have to "fake it till I make it." Which, by the way, I don't have a problem with that. I do think that personal problems should not interfere with work when dealing with customers all day. I do hope that if someone that I work with does read this, if they posted their thoughts or suggestions. But if they don't do that, well.. I guess there's nothing I can do about that. I like the idea of having a place to blast or vent, even if I may be waaay off. I'm not afraid of being told that I'm messed up, because I know I'm not perfect. Besides, the more people that know my weaknesses can (hopefully) say something or make a suggestion that would help me the next time a similar event happens. I'm not perfect, and I don't expect to make anyone think otherwise. I do strive to be like Christ, but I do fall. And Christ is the propitiation for my sin. That doesn't mean I sin thinking "oh, God's gonna forgive me anyway.." But my faith and trust lie in Christ.

Venting

Warning..

I am warning you that this is a post meant to vent. If you have a problem with that, then divert your attention elsewhere. Thank you.

I'm soo sick of work right now. I'm fine with the people I work with directly, but the Store Manager.. you know, the one who manages the store? Well, when she hardly ever shows up at the store she works at, that's reeeaaaally upsetting. Getting talked down to when I've been working here for more than 2 years as if I was recently hired. It's sooo hard to keep an upbeat attitude about everything. Especially when I do things without being asked, and nothing get's said. It's not that I look for praise, but when I go out of my way to try to make something better, beyond what is requested, there's no recognition. So that, combined with working there for, like i said, more than 2 years, and not getting recongition like so many of the other people that were hired after me got a 1 year gift, 2 year gift, birthdays off. Yea, that's a good one. My manager was standing talking to some of the other co-workers talking about how she thinks you shouldn't work on your birthday.. yea thanks, mine was 3 weeks ago (this happened earlier this month). Anyway.. i'm done venting. Had to get it out.

Worship

Worship is such a huge part of life. It wasn't untill I started playing on the worship team at Summit (http://www.summitchristianchurch.org) that I realized this. Playing with Steve Denny was always fun, but due to being involved in many many aspects of Summit, he couldn't really devote a whole lot of time to one aspect (i.e. worship). Don't get me wrong, I'm not in anyway implying anything negative about Steve. He is an awesome man of God and I believe God is going to do great things through him! But having a full time worship pastor (meaning, his focus is on worship only) has been such an awesome experience. Kurt has really taken worship in our church to the next level and it has been blessing my life so much! The big thing is that it's not all about the music. Music is just a channel of how we connect with God. There are many many channels that can be used to connect. Eevery week we get a message from Kurt before we start practice. He not only get's us into the music, but gives us the oppurtunity to get on the level with God before we even start. It's a great experience being a part of it, and it has started a change in my life toward God! So, if you read this, Thanks Kurt!

Ta da!

Yes yes, haven't posted in forever.. blah blah blah.. ya done?

Ok.

So I'm going to start reading that I just got. It's called God's Plan for the Ages, and it's written by Dr. David R. Reagan. I've recently gotten a little more interested in the end times and what signs of if it there are today. I know there's much argument, but I don't want to be closed minded to the events happening around us. It really does seem like the world is very unsettled these days. That's when it's awesome to see such a movement going on in the church.

My dad mentioned something to me that really made me think. We were talking about prophecies and end time stuff, and he mentioned that it's not possible for the end times to happen yet. Not that it's not close, but right now, it's not possible. He mentioned a verse in the bible (forgive me, I don't remember which one) where it says every nation will have believers, or something like that. Sorry if I'm way off. But the point is, it made me think about missions in the war-torn countries like, Iraq, Afganistan, and the nation of Palestine in general. Who is ministering to them? Who is going to them and showing them the Truth? Ever since he said that, I've had a tug on my heart about that and have started to think: "Am I called to be involved in ministering to them?" First of all, I don't even know what my calling (besides leading worship as a drummer) is.

In a few months I'll be going to Africa for about 3 weeks to a month. I plan on getting involved with missions while I'm down there. It's kindof scary because I've never been on a big missions trip. And now I'm kindof doing it on my own. (in other words, I'm going down there on my own, and looking up other missions down there)

One thing I know is that lately, I've been praying to see the power of prayer. And I think it's one of those things, that once you start praying for it and have the desire, God will overwhelm you with His answer. In the past few months my life has drastically changed. Worship has litterally become the passionate connection to a God that I knew alot about, but didn't really act upon. I find myself overcoming sins and shortcomings that I've had problems with, without hesitation! I find my life moving in a less general direction (good thing) and going toward building a firm foundation of faith. And I praise God for that movement in my life, and in my heart.